“Ladies and gentleman – we got ’im”
or “I’ve run out of Mars Bars – please arrest me”
Sunday was postponed as western media salivated over the capture of Saddam Hussain, or at least the beaten, bearded and guilty-looking Tikriti farmer paraded in front of our cameras after his discovery in a hole near the Tigris. The image iconized immediately. For the sofa electorate, this was the laziest day since September 11, though at least this time decaying minds could soak up some news for celebration. This was a day of pure infotainment.
For pro and anti-war observer alike it was impossible not to be buoyed by the sad sight of our Hitler/Koba. Yet when CPA head Paul Bremer had the privilege of announcing the news, using the above-mentioned archaic spaghetti western language, and Iraqi and Arab journalists broke into cheer, Americans still seemed embarrassed by the impromptu joy.
Blair, Hutton inquiry findings looming, was next up on the world stage, offering a non-triumphant take on the news. Schroder and Chirac offered their congratulations. Bush pitched last, and did his level best to offer a sober reading from the autocue. The bottom lip, forever about to waver into a smile suggestive of “enormous election boon”, kept betraying him. Filling the gaps were analyst after analyst, from heavyweights like Simpson to keen field embeds like Neely and security specialists. Washington correspondents such as More added little of substance, while Frei brilliantly commented: “Things are now being moved along by events, and events, by their very nature, are surprising." Indeed, ITV News was so excited it led with a feature entitled “next stategies” – whatever they are. The phrase ‘the Iraqi people’ – safer by far now, surely? – was used 9,000 times.
What was frequently omitted was the fact that he seemed to have been betrayed by local informers, hardly suggestive of this hardcore Sunni Triangle heartland/badlands we kept being informed about. And whereas Uday and Qusay wanted to go out like Tony Montana (the former got through as many drugs), Saddam whimpered out of history, reminding us that cowardice and despotism are flipsides of the same coin.
The more prescient commentaries have realised this is not the end of the resistance. Why would it be when a land of diverse peoples are under military occupation? And also don’t think that his capture, interrogation and trial will lead to the discovery of any worthwhile amount of WMDs. And it will also be very interesting to see how the coalition caters to Iraqi demands for a trial in Iraq. No, ‘cos they got ‘im, they wants to keep ‘im.
All in all, a great day for chucking the media lapdogs a juicy tit-bit to literally make a meal of and provide ample excuse for further narrowing of the coverage and news agenda generally.
See also today's
Political Peccadillo